Apply the 5 Love Languages to Yourself

So we’ve all heard of the 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman right? It breaks down love into 5 categories: words of affirmation, acts of service, gifts, quality time, and touch. Knowing our love languages helps better understand how we as individuals feel more loved and cared for, and also helps in making our partners feel loved and cared for as well. However, one aspect of the 5 love languages that has not been discussed as often is applying them to ourselves in the form of self love.

With this year being as it is: COVID, Pandemic, Election, and just about everything else; we can take a minute to practice self love and meet our own needs. Through exploring self love with the 5 love languages; I’ve learned that each category has its place. So where do we start? Check out the suggestions below.

Words of Affirmation: With time, receiving words of affirmation from my husband has made me feel loved and cared for. However, me telling myself affirmations does wonders to my headspace as well. In fact, I have a list of affirmations in my phone, which I always refer to whenever I have a moment of anxiety, and trust me the anxiety with pregnancy amongst all of this; is real! I keep telling myself “I am healthy and strong.”, “I’m exactly where I need to be.” etc etc.

Quality Time: Spending time in solidarity is the best thing for me. In fact I need it everyday. As I’m writing this, we’ve just wrapped up Diwali-which meant a lot of family time. While I enjoyed it, I couldn’t be more grateful that the festivities are over, and I can recharge being by myself. Everyday, I make it a point to work out in the morning by myself, take a walk in the lawn, and watch a show/movie on Netflix. With so many challenges this year alone, I’ve had days where I feel so mentally over it and spent, that I’ve begun taking mental rest days, which have helped significantly. Actions like these have really made me value my alone time.

Gifts: So I love receiving gifts, and in more recent months I’ve started treating myself with shopping here and there. Whether it’s a makeup or fashion product; I do get shopping itches every 3 months or so; and frankly rather than “controlling the urge” I scratch the itch. It’s 2020, which has been a lot so a little TLC with shopping never hurt anybody.

Acts of Service: Honestly, I didn’t even know how to incorporate this one until recently. I was getting irritated just being at home. So I felt the urge to clean up and declutter. Let me tell you. That felt SO SO good. I got rid of old clothes, old papers, and did a full reorganizing. Not only was it therapeutic, but everything all of a sudden felt new. In fact I even rearranged a little furniture in my bedroom, and that’s changed up the space dramatically.

Touch: Taking deep breaths, giving myself a head massage, doing a face mask: it does wonders to my mood. Basically being present with my body and giving it what it needs really helps with feeling relaxed. I’ve recently started doing neck rolls and small stretches in the morning. It feels amazing!

So those are a few ways how I’ve been applying the 5 love languages to my self care and self love practices. Self love is so so important, especially in challenging times like this. Therefore, give this a try. I promise you will feel much much better about yourself. Treat yourself, you definitely deserve it!

Much Love!


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  1. December 9, 2020 / 9:05 pm

    This is so beautifully done! And especially needed during this time of the year. 💚

  2. Archana
    December 10, 2020 / 8:23 am

    This is actually true😊

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